Welp.

So we went to the mountains. {Takes a drink. Pauses. Considers what to write next. Starts typing. Erases. Changes title of post from "We didn't die" to "Well, THAT was fun." Considers just posting pictures. Pregnant pause.}

What to say.... What to say...

This weekend we went on a trip with three other couples to Lushan, an area of China known for beautiful vistas and the largest freshwater lake. A Chinese co-worker of Josh's organized the trip and had set us up with an itinerary down to the minute. (Literally, we had scheduled time just for sitting in traffic!) Late Friday night the 10 of us (two Chinese couples, Brendan and Holly, and us with the kiddos) headed to the train station. Two train rides and a insane taxi ride later we arrived at our hotel, also known as the cheapest place in town. The nice way to describe the hotel would be to say, "It was an adventure!" So I will just say, "It was a terrifying adventure!" and you will just have to fill in the blanks on your personal nightmare hotel experiences and multiply by 10.

The next morning we got up and took an hour's drive up, up, up the switchbacks of a mountain in a 15 person van with 16 people in it. If you are down with barreling up a hill in the wrong lane with substantial oncoming traffic then this was your dream ride. Fifteen people got out nauseous. I got out and kissed the freaking pavement.

The little town we stayed in was kinda like Nashville, Indiana, but instead of knickknacks they sold baiju, tea, porcelain, and cigarettes. Instead of artistic creations decorating the sidewalks and doorways, there was sausage hanging (out to dry?!) everywhere off of every surface.
Naturally, we fit right in and captured no extra attention whatsoever. Ha. Ha. It was pretty epic the amount of attention we received. Actually, we were so popular that poor Holly was asked a handful of times by groups of teenage Chinese boys to pose for pictures. (Everyone thinks she is French. Which I LOVE, by the way!!!)

So this is our hotel's laundry line. There are the clothes.
And also on the line is dinner. Meat hanging right there too!

Our hotel in town was better than the one the previous night, mostly because the primary cause of death from it would only be black lung from the mold on the curtains and walls. We did not spend much time there though. We headed to lunch on a really cool balcony overlooking part of town. A family of bees and their cousins the wasps also were hungry for our food and drinks, so they joined us.

Oh gracious! Don't I sound whiny! Seriously, it was so great to have all the details planned for us! The other couples did a great job ordering our food and basically helping us navigate every single detail of the two days. It is just really hard to be in such a foreign place and so dependent on other people. The kids were pretty energetic, naturally, too and so we had our hands full in a new place.

This little monkey is going to be such a handful! 

The by far, coolest aspect of the entire weekend which will forever be why I do not remember any of the above and can only focus on this moment, was the fact that we were able to hike in pseudo fresh air, in the woods, to see nice vistas. We have been so urbanized for the past 5 months that it was a real treat!

And on this beautiful said hike, we were just walking as people do, and there on the trail like a scurry of squirrels was a band of monkeys. Real monkeys. Wild monkeys. Eating trash just like you think that they would (?!?!) and making me just squeal with delight. Once I saw a Chinese man photographing a chipmunk at the Grand Canyon and it made me laugh. It was a chipmunk. Those run around my yard. Welp, I was the crazy tourist because I took a blue million photographs of those stinking monkeys. Because of the way we hiked we had to double back. This time we saw them again, three of them, and collectively they kind of had us in a crossfire. We were enjoying watching them and going slowly about our business when Papa Monkey came barreling into the show. Suddenly it became apparent that we were not in the crossfire of three monkeys but there were MANY MANY around us. It was freakishly awesome.

Sunday we had another day of hiking and enjoying the sunshine. Despite the cold, it was really great to see some falling leaves and nature. The area was made famous by several historic events which revolved around Chairman Mao, so he had a home there which we toured. So I saw the lake where he supposedly skinny-dipped. I would have never pegged the man for a swimmer...

Hudson and Mrs. Chen enjoying the pond.

I don't think I can say much more about our experiences at Lushan without sounding like I am writing a TripAdvisor review (which I will, believe you me, and it will get one star!) but "it was an adventure" that I really don't need to have again. I can share our tales of near death experiences (note the plural) and freezing meals (as in we were the ones freezing) and a great tale of witnessing a chicken being killed right there alongside the table Holly, a vegetarian, was eating at.

For my part, I hope to never again be in a passenger van with people puking in front and behind me. And P.S. I am going to be 40 years old in 11 days, I think I am too old for scary hotels with plywood beds too.

T found a T sign!